- - - ON HIS PEDESTAL

[LOLITA WINDSONG AVERY]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true] leave the dead starlet, let the sideways rain in the crooked street remain words: 430, tagged: cel/pepper outfit: here, notes: babies Loli didn’t often get insecure when it came to relationships. He wasn’t the jealous type, but it was rather needy. He needed to know that he was the only boy Pepper would ever consider aside from celebrities and cute shirtless boys on the beach. He needed to know that there wasn’t anything to worry about. Loli didn’t get jealous or angry at the thought of Pepper with other boys, or thinking about other boys, he got upset and heartbroken. And knowing that Pepper was roommates with someone else who liked boys, even if Mickey was dating someone, made Loli worried. The more he thought about it the more scared of losing his lion. The more worried he grew over something happening between Pepper and Mickey. He needed clarification. He needed promise. He just needed to be told nothing would happen a few times so it would ease his worried mind. But Pepper seemed distracted today and Loli’s notebook was fresh out of paper. He had to rely on what little sign language his boyfriend knew and attempting to make sure his body language and expressions were enough to communicate. Normally it wasn’t an issue to not have anything to make words with. Normally it wasn’t something Loli had to worry about with his boyfriend. They didn’t need talk or write or sign, they could just sit there and hold one another and it was fine. Right now Loli was seated comfortably in Pepper’s lap, the pair sprawled out on one of the lounge’s couches. In his boyfriend’s lap a bit more affectionate than usual. Clingy and needy and he just couldn’t get himself close enough. It didn’t seem to be enough to display his feelings of insecurity though, so Loli rolled over so he was facing Pepper, poking him in the chest to get his attention. Do you like Mickey?

[/i][/color] he signed slowly, hoping it as simple enough that Pepper would understand. His lips pursed into a sad little pout and he stared at Pepper with a sad intensity, drawing little circles on his boyfriend’s chest in the mean time. This was one of the few times when Loli hated being deaf and hated not being able to talk. One of the few times when he just wanted to be a normal teenage boy who could actually voice his concerns. This was frustrating and it only made it worse. He poked Pepper’s chest once again, made a heart with his hands, and then pointed to himself. Asking if he was loved. Wanting that clarification and that peace of mind.



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[PETER FREDERIC GERALD]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #883a2f; border-bottom:30px solid #883a2f; border-top:30px solid #883a2f; border-right: 30px solid #883a2f;] Pepper couldn't help but feel a bit ... out of it lately. Perhaps it was just the fact that things got really busy around this time of the year, and he was exceptionally tired. But that didn't seem to stop him from spending time with his boyfriend, being as cute as ever. They sat on one of the couches at the school lounge, a hot spot for a lot of students. However, on this particular occasion, there only seemed to be a few other students hanging out at the lounge and shooting pool, not making too much noise so the two of them had a degree of solitude. He had noticed that Loli's notebook was just out of paper which had meant that they could only communicate via sign language. It wasn't a particular problem for them anyway. They seemed to just enjoy each other's company, and that seemed to be enough to melt each other's hearts. Admittedly, Pepper was excited to practice his signing, and he knew Loli would have the patience for him to learn it. Loli seemed extra loving lately and Pepper had noticed. He tried his best to return the affection, but he was a little suspicious as to where it was coming from. The two of them were already outrageous when it came to public displays of affections, and Pepper could tell that they were making people awkward. He didn't care though. Not at all. People should know by now what happens if you mess around with Pepper and Loli. Needless to say that someone would get assaulted by an cape-less exotic animal they have only seen locked up in zoos. Loli poked him in the chest, and Pepper snapped out of a daze that he didn't even realize he was in. With a smile, he looked to his boyfriend with smiling and twinkling eyes and began to gently message Loli's knee. He was going to sign something to him, Pepper could tell. He straightened up and looked at his boyfriend to try and sincerely to understand what he was trying to say. After some slow signing movements, it was clear that Lolipop had signed, Do you like Mickey? and then made an incredibly heat-breaking face as he fingered circles on Pepper's chest. Pepper was confused and a bit shocked. At first he didn't say anything because he couldn't believe that his boyfriend would think of something so ridiculous. Loli poked him in the chest once more, clearly looking for an answer. Pepper unwrapped his arms from around Loli, and looked him sternly in the eye. "No, I don't like Mickey." he said out loud, signing the only words he knew (adding an emphasis to the 'no') the best he could. His eyebrows were furrowed and Pepper's mind filled with different questions and anxieties like: Had he made it seem like he liked Mickey? Did Mickey say something? He could feel himself getting hot and a bit red ... he wasn't just perplexed by Loli's question, but also a bit offended that he would think that he'd be unfaithful or that he would lust after someone else. Saying what he had said had prompted the rest of the people in an earshot to exit out of the lounge in a casual pace, but Pepper was so smitten with Loli's question that he didn't notice. "Why would you say that?" he said again out loud, and simultaneously signing the few words he knew. notes, omgggg Dx word count, idk i never count thanks brooklyn from shine

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[LOLITA WINDSONG AVERY]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true] leave the dead starlet, let the sideways rain in the crooked street remain words: 585, tagged: cel/pepper outfit: here, notes: babies Loli had always felt that within the safety of Grace Island he didn’t have to worry about how affectionate he was with his boyfriend. The boys on the beach? That was just one isolated incident. That didn’t matter. But Loli knew that if they were back home in his little New York town filled with racism and discrimination it would be very different. Loli could never be ashamed of Pepper or of himself, but he knew when it was best to be cautious and when it was okay to be open about his affectionate nature. This island was safe. He was protected here. He had Pepper to watch over him if anyone had a problem. But if everyone was so safe and happy and perfect, why was he so scared of losing Pepper? Why was he so paranoid about the Mickey situation? He knew he had absolutely no reason to worry but he did anyways. He felt like a bad boyfriend for being so scared. Love wasn’t logical. Love didn’t always make sense. The hand on his knee tickled a little bit but in a soothing way, calming a few of the boy’s nerves but not quite all of them. Dozens of little ones were left over, tiny worries that had built up since finding out about Mickey. When Pepper straightened up he did as well, scooting down a bit so he was sort of straddling the other boy and looking directly at him. Watching his lips and his rusty sign language. He was cute how hard Pepper tried to learn, even though Loli never really expected people to. Yeah, it would be really nice if the entire world knew sign language but it wasn’t going to happen so he didn’t really expect people to learn just for him. If they chose to he would help, otherwise he tried to find other ways around it. The longer he waited for an answer the more he expected a ‘yes’ to come from Pepper’s lips, despite how farfetched and impossible that was. Half of Loli knew it was stupid to assume such things while the other half was insecure and scared. His expression was a mix of hopeful and heartbroken, still pouting and eyes round and moist with threatening tears. He cried a lot okay. The only answer he could give for the moment was shaking his head, seeing the hurt on Pepper’s face and feeling incredibly guilty for it. He was so torn right now. Torn between feeling like he was the worst person ever for upsetting his boyfriend, but also feeling like it was justifiable for him to be a little insecure every now and then. This was too confusing for him. The people leaving only just barely registered to him and he didn’t even look away from Pepper to watch them go, he just kept his eyes fixated on Pepper and kept telling the tears to hold on a minute. Mickey is just so…

[/i][/color] He stopped, looking up at the ceiling. As it had the answers. He could only think of one word that Pepper would know to convey how he felt, but it probably wasn’t the best to use. He had little choice though. Sexy,[/i][/color] he finished with a bit of uncertainty. He tapped Pepper’s chest a bit as a way of saying “you”, followed by the letter “r” and then pointing to himself. He then shook his head and signed the word for “go”, the best way he could say “I don’t want to lose you” without his notebook.

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[PETER FREDERIC GERALD]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #883a2f; border-bottom:30px solid #883a2f; border-top:30px solid #883a2f; border-right: 30px solid #883a2f;] He had absolutely no idea where this was coming from. Where did Loli possibly get the idea that he had shown interest in Mickey? Sure, Mickey was good looking and smart, but he wasn't as unique or as beautiful as Loli. Had Pepper done something wrong? Had he not made it clear enough that the two of them were like perfectly molded puzzle pieces? Was it Mickey? Had he said something to Loli that had triggered all of this? Oh man, if he did, he would get a fur-ball full. It upset Pepper, and he knew that him being upset made Loli upset, so he tried to remain calm. That wasn't so easy though, Pepper being so transparent. He pushed away his initial emotions to watch what Loli was signing. Mickey is just so ... sexy. he had signed, and Pepper got the message. He was a bit appalled and it showed on his face. Pepper was a dramatic guy and in this situation, he had every right to be. "He is NOT!" he nearly shouted, and signing with great movements and emphasis. "Loli," he said out loud sternly and signed his name, "You know you are the only one." But he wasn't sure if it came across right. His signing was really bad, and kind of sloppy. Plus, he didn't like to touch his face. But Loli had something else to say. Something with an R .... and Pepper just couldn't understand it! JUST COULDN'T! It kind of irritated Pepper. He wanted the message right away, not to have to wait for it. His head tilted to the side, and his eyebrows scrunched together, making him look a bit mad. "What?" he said, and signed. But what he didn't realize was that he signed it angrily, and it came off as rude and snappy. On the contrary, Pepper was trying his best to stay calm in this situation. He would have a bitch fight with anyone, but he wouldn't want to mess things up with Loli. No, not his counterpart. Not his other half. Pepper closed his eyes and took a deep breathe. To him, it was a way of calming down, but probably to Loli, it looked like he was tired of having to sign or something. That he was impatient and just overall frustrated with him. Pepper's eyes blinked open wearily and he watched his boyfriend. notes, buuuuhhhh thanks brooklyn from shine

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[LOLITA WINDSONG AVERY]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true] leave the dead starlet, let the sideways rain in the crooked street remain words: idk, tagged: cel/pepper outfit: here, notes: babies Loli wasn’t the confrontational type. He didn’t usually address issue such as these because he was far too afraid of the consequences that would come of such a thing. Far too afraid of losing whoever it was he was confronting forever. And right now the last thing he wanted to do was lose Pepper, but some unseen force was driving him to express his insecurities. When Pepper shouted he scooted back off of the other boy’s lap and flinched away from his voice, ducking his head away from the bright paw prints splashed with the red of Pepper’s emotions. All Loli could do was keep shaking his head and close his eyes for a moment so he could bite back the tears that threatened to escape. He pushed himself up against the arm of the couch, as far away from Pepper as he could. Because part of Loli was afraid that Pepper might change and he didn’t want to be in the line of fire if he did. Pepper didn’t seem to understand what Loli was trying to tell him and all he could do was let out a loud huff of breath followed by a small muffled sounding whine. He didn’t know how to express himself. He didn’t know how he was supposed to get Pepper to understand. He tossed his hands up in frustration and shook his head, looking around in desperation for something he could write on. Nothing. So he did the next best thing and pointed to Pepper once again, then to an exit sign, then to himself. That was the best he could do. The best that he had to express his fears of not wanting Pepper to leave him. He took a second to wipe his eyes before any tears fell and continued with his wild gesturing, pointing to his eyes them making a heart with his hands followed by his sign for “Pepper”.I love Pepper,

[/color] he repeated the signs and then continued on with more. I love Peper so much it hurts,[/color] he signed, wiping his eyes again and pointing to the exit sign once again with a shake of his head. That was the best that he had for now.

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[PETER FREDERIC GERALD]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #883a2f; border-bottom:30px solid #883a2f; border-top:30px solid #883a2f; border-right: 30px solid #883a2f;] UGHHHH!!! Pepper felt like he was punched straight through the stomach, out behind his back and left to just bleed out. He sat there, torn, as he watched countless tears run down Loli's face. It STUNG every time a drop of water bled down his smooth cheeks and clung to the perfect little grooves carved into his face. Pepper was tempted to reach out and wipe them away. To just say, 'Forget it, I'm sorry.' but Loli was signing wildly, he didn't get the chance ... not to mention that Pepper couldn't let it go. He was very much aware that Loli had some insecurities, but this plain ol' insulted Pepper! There is always that part of Pepper that didn't want to blame Loli for anything. That solid part of him that made up so much of him ... the one that just wanted to coddle and soothe and take care of his boy. It was the side that Pepper most exposed when he snuggled with Loli countless times in each other's beds, be it in human or lion form. Pepper's mood would swing as he sat there contemplating. He wanted to just stop it all and make him forget it. Just to go back where they were and to forget everything about this whole situation. But then as soon as he would be content with it, and calm enough to say something, an image of Al or something would flash in his mind and he'd be right back to angry! Loli signed with streams of tears, "I love Pepper so much it hurts." and it really got to him. Pepper felt like he was knocked on the head. As if some kind of ghost had bonked him on the head and reminded him of how in love they were. He was going to sign (or try to) something like, 'That's how you know you're in love.' and make things all better ... but Loli had pointed at the exit. Due to Pepper's complete lack of skill in when it came to ASL, this was misinterpreted. What? He wants me to leave? What? Pepper thought to himself. He was quick to jump to assumptions, something that was uncharacteristic to Pepper ... but this seemed to be a special occasion. Suddenly, Pepper stood up, frustrated with the whole situation. "What? You want me to leave?" Pepper threw his hands up in the air, incredibly exasperated from this conversation, he couldn't tolerate Loli right now. Just no. He couldn't do it. He would transform and do something he'd really regret... notes, sorry if i took long D; thanks brooklyn from shine

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